The kind of sensitive new man who would send me links to feminist websites with emails saying “thought you might be interested” and who would worr... about sexually objectifying or exploiting me when, truth be told, that was exactly what I wanted him to do. One night he was at mine & we were lying on the bed, fully dressed, watching a tacky documentary about sex workers in a brothel in Germany, if I remember right. I think I’d told him I was interested in it – which I was, but I think I was. ” He said with a giggle.“Actually, I don’t”, I said laughing but also telling the truth.“I think you need to prove that to me.”“OK, when?”He stood silent for a minute, looking at me and, I guess, trying to determine if I was serious or just messing with him. “There’s a party tonight, so why don’t I pick you up at 7:00.”“But what about Cindy?” By the look on his face, I realized I might have messed up with that question.“She is out of town with her family for the rest of the week, so tell me if. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. Let me try again. Never write a fucking novel, you idiot. I was happy with my life until I did. And then as soon as it published, everything turned to shit flavored frozen rain. And this is the most important thing… Whatever you do, never write a goddamn successful novel, you fucking idiot! ***** As you might have expected, I speak from personal experience. And now, in the time honored tradition of shitty novelists everywhere, I am going to take you all. “Ooh, it makes me wonder.”He heard Ramona cheering above the music: “Way to goRalph. That was fast.”He pulled the struggling Terry to him. Terry pushed backwith surprising strength, but gradually Ralph wasenveloped Terry with his arms. Terry certainly was flatbeneath the thick dress and undergarments. Ralph heldtightl and then spun around so that he was now holdingTerry face to face.He pushed Terry, and Terry fell backwards onto the bedwith Ralph on top. Ralph hoped this.
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