Do not do what want, standstill. Do not blink. Don’t even agree. Just play dead.Yes officer, I didn’t see the speed limit sign, I just didn’t se... you!This group is compliments of Alan B.Still more hand-picked lousy humor...Why is a woman like a condom? Because both spend more time in your wallet than on your penis.My girlfriend’s dad asked me what I do. Apparently “Your daughter” wasn’t the right answer.What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and. ......"What? Shethought, as she began to wake. I don't have any cloths on. Am I dreaming, orwhat?" she thought as her sleep was disturbed by the whispers of a man. Thenshe realized, "This isn't a dream anymore." She opened her eyes to see twostrange men at the foot of the bed, and one of them was sniffing herpanties. She started to scream out, then just before she did, she saw thegun tucked in the waist of one of the men's pants. Then she naturallythought of running, but as she tried to move. Once I got my tongue up there I could taste firsthand how much fun they had together before I even met her in the bar. That bitter, salty, acidic taste will never leave my memory from when I ate the love of this couple out of this gorgeous woman on the hood of her car.After clamping her legs on my head several times she begged me to stop. After I came up to her face and we made out some more she explained:“My boyfriend is very possessive and paranoid. Before I go out with friends or by myself. I was naked in my mother’s bed and my crotch was a mess of our dried cum. Thankfully it was NOT a dream. I finally smelled bacon and knew mom was cooking out normal Saturday breakfast. I walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. Mom was at the stove, wearing a tiny little robe and the barely covered her panty covered ass. “Good morning mom.”“Good morning bab…ROBBY! You’re naked! Go put some clothes on!”“But mom!!!”“CLOTHES! NOW!!”I started to walk back to me room to grab.
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