And, I would love to accept your proposal and make a life with you. But, we both know that I am not ready to do that ... not yet. I do not wish for an...thing to happen to you because of this damnable power that seems to control my life. I ... I am sorry. It is just that when you touch me, I do not wish to control myself. My entire life has been that of me controlling my wants and desires. Ever since the death of my papa, I held back from those around me, remaining both untouched and unloved. I. I think I put Shakespeare to shame with that one. A more articulate greeting I had never seen. But that still didn’t solve my dilemma of actually sending it. My thumb had been hovering over the send button for five minutes now as I fought tooth and nail with my demons. Finally I figured out my right thumb had declared mutiny against me and was refusing to obey my commands, so I used my left thumb to press down on my right thumb which eventually tapped the send icon. My shoulders sagged as I. The thing was I doubted he would believe her because she was barefooted, her shoes taken off long ago upstairs. Yikes.So, now what do I do? Do I lay there in a state of panic or do I get the hell out to my car through the back door? I waited and listened. An argument ensued and escalated, their voices getting louder and louder, the stomping of his feet ringing in my ears like the waves of guilt that passed through me with greater intensity each passing moment. I put on my shoes and left,. The afternoon session gave me a much better idea of what could be accomplished by a program like this. Jen didn’t ask them things like what is the symbolism and how are all the instances tied together to produce a symbolic framework in some book they’d read. That was the kind of stuff that made me nauseous when I had to go to English. She asked if they liked it or not, and why. She asked which characters they liked and why. She asked which characters they’d like to see ‘get it’ and why. She.
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